Refugees, All of Us

Refugees, All of Us

(Written for the art installation I created for Christ the King Presbyterian Church in El Paso, Texas)

When I first proposed to fill a ladies’ room with paintings, I got some puzzled looks. I mean… shouldn’t I aim for the front hall? I had my reasons:

• It’s a little empty and institutional in there.

• Making a bathroom charming isn’t always a budget priority. I can understand that.

But my most compelling reason was:

• Women and girls have a different relationship to the Ladies’ Room than men and boys have to the Men’s Room.

There’s long been a joke among men, a collective, imaginative wondering why we spend so much time in there, aside from the obvious. And why do we go in pairs, or even in groups? Don’t wonder too much, gentlemen. It’s not good for you.

The truth is we have more than one need for this place. One friend of mine told me how she realized she had the flu midway through a job interview. The interview was over lunch in a fancy restaurant. Sure, the interviewers wondered why she kept going to the ladies’ room, but she got the job in the end. The women’s bathroom is our protective fortress for many reasons:

It gives us privacy and a door between us and the world.

•   To make sure no one sees us cry.

•   To do a little victory dance when we got that job.

•   To give each other advice.

•   To look in the mirror and think dark things like, “So this is what it feels like to have cancer.”

•   Or wonderful things like, “I’m engaged! Can you believe it?”

•   To build one another up when someone is hurting.

•   To be alone for a few minutes.

•   To escape, regroup, regain our composure.

The Ladies’ Room is a refuge, not just plumbing. We are all refugees at some point. And in this place we go, there needs to be support. God knows we need it. He is always with us. He never leaves or forsakes us. He is on our side. But do we remember that when we most need to? Wouldn’t a little reminder help us know that whatever is going on with us, He is working toward our good because He loves us?

He’s filled the earth with reminders. Go outside and look at a leaf, any leaf. It’s beautiful, poetic, orderly, simple, a blessing. God ordained it for us to enjoy. In my work, I spend a lot of time connected to the floral world. I use its colors and forms to evoke memory and prompt people to see the beauty in their lives. Flowers. What else on earth exists just for beauty’s sake? When someone is sick, when there’s a wedding, a new baby, a graduation, a loss… what do we include? Flowers. They comfort us. They remind us that creation is marvelous. They express love.

Exactly what a refugee needs.

See the Paintings